Too much

There's too much going on this week.  I can't possibly list all the things that are happening in both my professional and personal lives.

I drove to see Dr. Liz this morning.  I sat in bumper-to-bumper traffic for two and a half f*cking hours only to go 30 miles.  I want(ed) to kill a small animal and I'm an animal rights activist.  This is how aggravated I feel.  Dr. Liz and I really didn't connect on the issue at hand or the infertility thing.  She wondered why she didn't receive a copy of the HSG results.  Um, that's because you're not the infertility specialist, Liz!  She asked me if I am taking any fertility drugs.  I told her my hormone tests were normal so no need for ovulation-induction drugs.  She said her "gut feeling" is that the mass in my breast is just breast tissue and that an ultrasound "would not show the things we want to see" so I have an order for a mammogram which my local place doesn't do and I'm too shaky from this morning's drive to consider going back there for the mammogram.

She asked me if I'd ever had an x-ray done before.  I asked if she meant an x-ray of my breasts?  No, she meant any x-ray of any kind.  What planet am I on?  This woman has been caring for me for ten years!!!  Have I ever had an x-ray before?  Yes, on my jaw, teeth, chest, pelvis (she knew I had a HSG!)  We were not getting along today.

I'm willing to accept doing the mammogram instead of the ultrasound (only after researching the difference) but I think she could have done a much better job at explaining why the mammogram is better.  I am pissed off that I'm a medical test zone.  Dr. Liz's receptionist had some parting words for me, "Well, you look great!"  If that counted for something.